1. I guess, you are asking when power plane can be reference plane. In many cases it can be for example when the signals running above/below power plane have same voltage level as the plane, or another example can be a power plane with many capacitors connected between GND and Power plane.
2. I am not sure exactly what you mean, but in some designs not all address signals are used - depends on size of memory chips which are connected. However if A15 is connected between CPU and memory chip and if that signal is used, it should be also length matched together with other address signals. Could you tell me what video and what minute:second are you referring to?
3. Again, depends on how memories are connected. I would recommend to have a look at different memory configurations and connections - google for words like slot (often there are two ranks/chipselects per 1 slot/module, but you can have more slots in one channel), rank/chipselect (usually more chips connected to the same bus, but only one is active), channel (usually another komplety separated memory interface), ....
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Memory_geometry4. For simulations I like to use a Wizard - that will ask you for settings of your design (e.g. controller, memories, etc). Then I use memory simulation tool - the tool runs all the kind of scenarios automatically (read, write, etc) and it will tell you what is wrong. Hyperlynx is good in this. PS: some time ago I made a video in Cadence about memory simulation:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-t25gJIDQNo